thats why jack stands suck for BMW's they seem to cut into the car more than keep the car lifted. if you have holes directly below the jack holes on the sides, than you are missing your jack pads. those, would be your best meathod of attack. you could use some sort of wooden 2x4 and put the jacks under there. however if they are gone it, use the 2x4 and use it flush to the body, you should cause damage, another point is shown in the picture, this is where i usually put the front pads of the lift when using the hydralic lift.
p.s you dont want to put all that pressure on your control arms, bending those is an expensive mistake.
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